My Story
About Lisa Baymler
I grew up in a small town – the youngest daughter of a teacher and a stay-at-home mom. Not only did I have 2 brothers and 6 sisters, my parents were foster parents and my mom had an in-home daycare, so there were always kids around. I was quiet and smart. I always tried to follow the rules and fly under the radar.
My life was pretty uneventful if I’m being totally honest. Any struggles I had were with classes I didn’t like or, you know, the normal teenage things. There were some family issues but certainly nothing huge. Other families had much worse histories, and I knew it. I saw it even. So again, I flew under the radar.
I went to college and did everything that was expected of me (think: got okay grades, graduated, found someone to marry and followed all the rules the way I was supposed to). But then life stepped in and changed things …
When I was 23 – after I graduated from college but before I got married – my dad died. You guessed it, I was daddy’s girl. This would be the first real struggle of my life … and with no handbook attached. It was a defining point in my life. (We’ll talk more about this later.)
I got married, worked in human resources and stayed married for nearly 20 years. I had 2 boys, got jobs and lost jobs, bought houses, sold houses and moved several times. I “accomplished” all things the average adult does I suppose … but somehow I always felt alone in most things I did. After almost 20 years of marriage, I met the real love of my life. I divorced my husband, married my current husband (another life adventure), became a business owner (a huge life adventure), lost my mother, my step-father-in-law and my grandfather-in-law within days of each other. (Whew…talk about a new road.) And now, we’re figuring out life with a my medical diagnosis.
I’ll talk about all of this in detail as we go, but the point is … we’re all similar. We have our own ups and downs, but they aren’t that much different from each others. Hopefully reading this will help you realize you aren’t alone in the world … because, well, you aren’t.
Why Blog?
Over the years I’ve found myself saying, “I wish I would’ve known…” or “Why isn’t there an easy resource to tell me how to get through this?” I’m hoping this (or I) could be it.
I always felt like nobody would tell me the truth about being a parent. The comments were always about how wonderful it was. Yes, kids are great. But they are also exhausting and dirty and loud. And nobody tells you before you get pregnant about the preteen years, or the teenage years, or heaven forbid … the fact that you’re a parent FOREVER! These are the things I want us to be able to talk about here. Open and honestly.
Millions of people get divorced, yet I had no realistic idea or helpful hints of what to do when going through it. No idea of how to handle my ex, much less my kids. Nobody to be real with about how it felt. No guide to follow about what not to do and what to be aware of. If I had only known. Maybe I can share some knowledge with someone going through it now.
There is an unending list of experiences many of us go through, yet we feel alone at the time we’re going through them. I hope that by writing this, you might know you aren’t alone while we have some REAL talk about life.
I Write
I write about life. My life. My experiences. What I know.
Let’s face it – I’m not an expert. I don’t claim to be. All I hope is that by sharing what I’ve learned, by going through what I have gone through (and what I continue to go through) that someone might feel better or learn something.
There’s so much pressure to be perfect in this world. To not ask for help. To not ask questions. I believe this is the root of loneliness. We’re made us feel like we have to figure everything out on our own. My goal is to change that.
Need Advice?
I’m no expert – and I’m certainly not perfect – but if you’re looking for some honest, open feedback, I’m happy to give it.
Sometimes that’s all you need.